NBC
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There was a lot of reality singing competition show news week and most of it was news that didn’t even involve ‘The Voice’ or ‘American Idol.’ For example, apparently Kelly Clarkson will be joining an ABC singing competition wherein she’ll travel the country and look for a duet partner. So, that’s a thing. And then, of course, the HUGE not news that Brittany Spears may or may not be joining ‘The X-Factor.’ But, let’s talk about the shows that are currently airing, shall we?

‘The Voice:’ For me the “battle rounds” of ‘The Voice’ are the weakest. For a show that’s usually so bright and bubbly, they just feel needlessly mean spirited and kind of pointless. Every show can use a “weeding out” phase, but these battle rounds are, like, three weeks long! Even ‘Idol’ which takes forever to do EVERYTHING cuts the final 25 or so down to 13 in two nights. So, I’m not crazy about them, BUT Miranda Lambert was there, so that was great!
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Hey, did you guys know Chris was classically trained?
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At this point – It’s Friday – you all know who won the battles, so there’s no need to recap it. Instead, I’ll just say my favorite part of ‘The Voice’ this week was watching people drive around in Kia’s. Oh and also hearing RaeLynn sing the word “horses,” which sounds like “Hor-sayes.”
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A memo to Christina, it’s silly to change to gender pronouns in well known songs. If Ashley and RaeLynn can “write her name in the sky,” surely Chris can be “your lady.” We can deal.
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Lastly, the fact that someone had to go home in the Anthony vs. Jessie battle was just ridiculous. How does Christina put them together?
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Now, let’s move on to the A show.
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FOX
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‘American Idol:’ This is the time to be watching ‘Idol.’ Once the Top 13 take the stage, it’s impossible to say that any other show of it’s kind is stronger. It’s also a lot of fun to nitpick and conspiracy theorize, which I ALWAYS do!
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First of all, Nigel Lythgoe is an evil, evil man who writes a script on week one and does everything in his power to manipulate America into following through. That script usually starts with “a man must win ‘American Idol.’ Watch this show for the remainder of the season with this thought in mind and watch how the men are treated vs. the women. It couldn’t have been more obvious than when it was announced night one would be boys vs. girls and that girls would have to sing WHITNEY HOUSTON! The boys were given Stevie Wonder who is a great singer, but WHITNEY HOUSTON! Lythgoe was foiled, though, when the judges elected to send Jeremy home instead of Elise. God help me if Elise went home. Elise is my favorite, you guys. I thought it was going to be Erika (and I do love Erike) but it’s Elise. She’s mature, sure of who she is as an artist and she’s a risk taker. Team Testone!
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Now for some Quick Thoughts:
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FOX
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-The women are stronger vocally than the men. This doesn’t mean much because teenage girls will still be voting for Phil Phillips.
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-Speaking of Phil Phillips, something, something, something kidney stones.
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-Jessica Sanchez nailed “I Will Always Love You,” but America don’t sleep on Hollie Cavanagh. We could be prepping for a “battle of the babies.” In that battle, I’m Team Hollie.
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-Can we stop calling Jermaine Jones “The Gentle Giant” please?
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-I’m infinitely sick of Heejun’s schtick. He’s got one of the weakest voices and this whole “detahced, wait a second, ‘what’” thing is the worst. He’s just trying too hard.
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-Colton Dixon takes himself way, way too seriously. Dude, your on ‘American Idol.’
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-I’m shocked Shannon survived week one and, quite frankly, I don’t think she deserved to. Jeremy wasn’t the best singer in this competition, but he wasn’t the worst on that night.